zombie toma


This journal is now semi-friends only!
  • I'm PufferfishFace from Tumblr, just so you know~
  • Please comment to be added. Or add me first. Whatever works.
  • It would be nice if we had something in common. Perhaps, a never-ending love for Alice Nine/Toma/Arashi/NEWS? See my user info for more.
  • My public posts include my fiction most of the time. My private posts include fangirl squiggles and my daily life and whatnot.
And don't steal my chibi Toma!
zombie toma

Dream Eater - Ch. 3 - "Jailbreak"

Title: Dream Eater
Chapter: 3/? "Jailbreak"
Rating: PG (Some scary images if you allow your imagination to see them)
Notes: I don't know what took me so long to finish this. I wrote it over the span of two months, so it feels awkward to me when I read it all together. BUT! I work really hard on it, so I hope you guys will think otherwise. I would be embarrassed if I told you the inspiration of this chapter. But anyway...
Dreams don't make sense most of the time. So I mean not every single event in my writing has to has a proper meaning or significance. I bet you will have a lot of questions after reading this. Beware the nightmares~
Chapter 1: http://themikachu.livejournal.com/10968.html
Chapter 2: http://themikachu.livejournal.com/11124.html

I groaned as I opened my eyes. ‘My alarm didn’t go off…?’ I thought, moving my arms to stretch and rub the blur out of my vision. My hand brushed against something warm, firm. My eyes shot open, and my heartbeat accelerated. I was suddenly aware of myself. I let my eyes slowly travel up to see who… ‘Kei.’ My heart stopped. I was lying next to him, my head on his arm as a pillow, and my hand on his torso. He was staring at me with that unreadable expression of his. I jumped up and away from him, embarrassed. My heart felt like it was beating out of my chest and I was sure my cheeks were glowing.

“You’re awake,” he smirked a little.

“Uh,” I replied. “Good… morning?” My eyes darted around, taking in my surroundings. We were in a small, brick room. Kei was lying on what looked like a cot. I looked up. There was no ceiling; the room was open to the sky, which was dark and littered with stars. “Oh. Not morning,” I corrected myself.

“There’s not much time,” Kai said, getting off the cot. “Let’s go.” He grabbed my wrist and pulled me over to one of the walls. Now it resembled a rusty barred door. Kai pushed it open as if it weren’t even locked. Well, it probably wasn’t locked. As we exited, I looked back. If I didn’t know better, I’d say that room was a prison cell.

As Kai continued pulling me along, I looked around. Next to our cell were dozens of other prison cells, dimly lit by torches hanging from the brick walls. I couldn’t tell how far down the cells went, because it was too dark. Suddenly Kai stopped. We were at a hallway intersection, and he was looking both ways cautiously. I heard him suck in a breath, and he pushed us further back into a shadow. I strained my eyes, but I didn’t see anything. Then I heard footsteps, very faint but approaching. I held my breath as we watched a guard in uniform march right past us. When it was clear, Kai tugged me along again.

Eventually we made it out of the walls of the prison. Here, we could see where the sky touched the ground. Only it wasn’t touching the ground; it was touching the sea. We were standing at the edge of a port. The sky was still a deep black, but the full moon dimly lit our path. As we crept along the docks, I could hear the water swishing against the boats. Only hearing the occasional waves against the complete silence was eerie. Kei, ahead of me, was crouching slightly. He looked around cautiously, but still didn’t say anything to me. Suddenly he made a sharp turn to the right and he visibly straightened. His pace sped up and I struggled to keep up without having to jog.

“Kei?” my voice came out quietly. “Where are we going?”

“Shh,” he answered, not even turning to look back at me. I sighed and let myself look around again. The port was huge, and we seemed to be right in the middle of it now. There were sailboats in every direction. Behind them, I could make out a bay. The water was dark too, but the moon reflected over its surface. Beyond that, I could distinguish the opposite shore. On the shore’s edge was what seemed to be a large, brick fort, but I knew it was the jail we had escaped from. ‘Why were we even in jail in the first place?‘ I wondered. Where I could see the farthest, I could barely make out a soft haze of ‘… Pixels?’ The same as I had seen when I first met Kei in my dream. I furrowed my eyebrows together, wondering if what was happening right now and what I saw in that dream were related.

“OOF!” I had run into something. Oh. It was Kei.

“Sorry,” I mumbled. Suddenly a gasp escaped from my lips. We were standing outside of a run-down shack. The windows were boarded up and the door was broken. Above, a dirty sign read
Bait and Boat Rentals
Kei disappeared inside and I quickly followed, not wanting to get left behind. The inside of the shack was deceptively large considering the size of the building from the outside. The entryway opened up into a large room; at one end there was a counter with an old-fashioned cash register sitting on it. Behind it, there were shelves lined with nothing but dust. Next to the counter was a door. Or rather, a doorway missing its door. I caught the movement of clothing. Kei. I followed him through the doorway, which lead to a long hallway lined with doors. There was a single light in the middle of the hallway, but it was dim and flickered often. I wondered how the electricity could still be working in a place like this, until I noticed Kei.

He was opening each door, one by one, as if he were looking for something. He seemed to grow more aggravated with each door. I wanted to ask, but he seemed so determined; I didn’t want to bother him. Curious, I turned to the closest door and opened it. It was dark. Moonlight shone dimly through the window, but I could tell the room was empty. I looked back into the hallway. Kei was further down, still frantically opening doors.

I was turning to close the door when I noticed a pair of glowing eyes in the middle of the room. They were only a foot off the ground and they were staring right at me. A squeak sounded from my lips as I slammed the door shut and snatched my hand away as if it had burned me. My heart was pounding.

“Keeeeiiiii?” I called, stiffly walking down the hallway. He wasn’t anywhere to be seen. Suddenly the light above me flickered out, leaving me in darkness.

“Kei…?” My voice choked a little. “Kei,” I said a little louder. There was no answer. The shack was silent; I couldn’t even hear the water outside. As my eyes adjusted to the dark, I could make out my shadow in front of me. I realized the docks outside would be brighter than in here. I turned towards the entrance, but I stopped in my tracks.

The glowing pair of eyes was there, glaring at me, blocking the entryway. Frozen, I slowly sucked in a breath. Two breaths. The eyes didn’t blink. The silhouette was not human. It was too small, too stout. It was too dark to make out anything else.

‘Maybe I should go find Kei,’ I thought. ‘He must still be inside…’ I took a cautiously step backwards, keeping my gaze down the hall. No movement, not even a blink. Sensing no danger, I turned and took a few steps deeper into the darkness of the shack.

“Kei?” I whispered. I glanced back down the hallway again. The pair of eyes was no longer there.

I looked down at my feet; and there were the glowing eyes staring up at me. I screamed.

Suddenly there was a horrible scratching coming from each of the doors in the hallway. It sounded like claws frantically scraping on the wooden doors. I screamed again and ran further into the dark until I came upon a door. There were no sounds coming from behind this door; I had no choice. I burst through it and slammed it shut behind me.

I was outside again. The moonlight and the sloshing waves were somehow comforting to me, but I struggled to catch my breath. “Kei!” I yelled, not immediately seeing him.

“Yes, I’m right here,” A voice sounded next to me. I flinched and looked over. Kei was sitting against the building looking deflated.

“Kei!” I shouted again and rushed over to him.

“I can hear you just fine,” he replied, the tone of his voice dull and depressed. He looked up at me through his hair. “What do you want? You’re so loud,” he said irritably. I looked at him in disbelief.

‘Why is he acting like this?’ I thought. ‘Doesn’t he…’ I stopped myself and took a quick look at the door I had come through. Nothing had followed me outside. There was no scratching at the door, no peering eyes glaring at me. ‘Did Kei even hear me screaming?’ Kei was still looking at me questioningly.

“Little… tiny… THINGS,” I whispered, unable to find the words to describe the creepy, foot-tall figures. “With strange glowing eyes,” I added. Kei blinked at me and raised an eyebrow.

“Little tiny ‘things’ with strange glowing eyes?” he repeated, eyeing my like I was crazy.

I nodded. “In those rooms-“ He let out a short laugh, cutting me off.

“Those rooms were all empty. There’s nothing here…” he trailed off.

“But…” I glanced at the door once more, but again nothing was there. “Uhhmmm… were you looking for something?” I asked. Kei had stood up and started walking.

“Nothing,” he said, his tone ending with conversation. I sighed in defeat and moved to follow him. Then I heard a rustle behind me. I froze, not wanting to look but I couldn’t stop myself.

Slowly, I turned and was met with a hideous creature. It had a stretched, crusted nose like an elephant trunk, and fleshy arms that ended with long, sharp claws. The skin of its body squirmed as if bugs were crawling over it. It was the exact image of the monsters from my nightmares, and it was not six feet away from me. My body went cold.

I wanted to shout out, scream for help, but my voice was stuck in my throat.

I managed to gulp. “Kei,” I tried again. It barely came out as a squeak. I heard Kei’s heavy steps fading behind me. He was mumbling to himself, or maybe to me.

‘Kei… Kei, please turn around!’ I pleaded in my head. I heard his steps turn left and disappear. My heart was pounding in my chest. I tried to take a step backwards, but my legs wouldn’t budge. ‘No…’ I thought. ‘I’m going to die, aren’t I?’ The monster still hadn’t moved, but now there was a hungry glint in its eyes.

Suddenly I heard Kei’s footsteps approaching. “Why are you so slow?! I-…“

I could picture the look of shock on his face as he came back around the corner. I heard Kei curse under his breath. “Get away from that thing,” he warned. His voice was low and careful, as if not to disturb the creature.

“I-I can’t move,” I managed to mutter between my teeth. My voice shook. “Keiii…” I whimpered. I could hear his footsteps cautiously approaching me.

“Don’t move. Don’t take your eyes off of it,” Kei murmured. It seemed like an eternity before he finally reached me. I felt him grab my arms and gently guide me backwards. “Keep your gaze on it,” he whispered in my ear. I felt myself nod.

The monster before us didn’t move an inch, but a low growling sounded from it as soon as I took the first step back. And with each step we took, the growling grew louder and louder. “Just don’t look away from it,” Kei answered the question I didn’t have to ask out loud.

At that moment, the terrible, horrid sound of claws rasped at the door. I gasped and couldn’t stop myself from glancing over in reflex. “No!” Kei whispered frantically, but it was too late. The monster let out a shriek that left my ears ringing. Behind it, the door burst outwards and the dock began to flood with countless little monsters. Long trunks, clawed hands; they were all the same, and they were all staring at me. Only this time, they could move.

“Run…” Kei muttered, his grip on my arm tightening. The monsters started toward us, the gap between us closing rapidly.

“RUN!!” Kei yelled, pulling me. When he looked back at me, I could see the panic in his eyes. My legs were heavy and stiff. I felt like I was running through peanut butter. Kei managed to drag me along and we turned the corner. We were met with a line of rusted aluminum boats. Kei let go of me to jump deftly into one of them.
“Get in!” he shouted, anxiously pulling the ignition to the motor. It sputtered, but wouldn’t start. He tried again, with no success. He looked around the small boat and came up with two rowing oars. He attached them to their hooks and looked at me. “C’mon!”

“I… I can’t,” I heard myself say. “I’ve never been on a boat… and I can’t swim,” I said, eyeing the water. I…” Suddenly the roars of the monsters sounded closer. They sounded ravenous.

“Do you trust me?” he yelled, holding out his hand. I could see his eyes flickering between me and the dock behind me, where the monsters were approaching from.

“I…” He didn’t wait for an answer before he grabbed my hand and pulled me harshly into the old boat. Then with swift hands he untied the rope securing us to the dock and pushed us away from the abandoned shack.

Getting away from the dock made me feel only slightly safer. I kept glancing back, paranoid, waiting for the little monsters to burst out from around the corner and continue chasing us. But they never came. There was a dull emptiness in my head, and I couldn’t seem to remember anything that had happened before we had entered the shack. It was silent again; Kei’s rowing was the only sound. “Calm down,” Kei said, watching me as he rowed. “They won’t get us out here.”

“Wha-…what were those things?!” I shouted, still searching with my eyes.
He looked back towards the docks even though nothing was there. “…Dream eaters,” he said quietly. He looked calmer now, making me feel safer too.

“Dream eaters?” I questioned. “What’s a-“ I stopped. My vision was blurred. Suddenly tears overflowed down my cheeks and a sob shook my body. ‘Why am I crying?!’ I thought to myself, confused and self-conscious.

“It’s just the adrenaline,” Kei said, as if he had read my thoughts. He put the oars down and moved closer to me. I tried to wipe away the tears, but they kept coming. “It’s alright,” he said gently, putting a comforting hand on my shoulder. “It was just a nightmare. It’s over now.” Another sob escaped from my chest and my hands trembled as I rubbed my eyes.

“Here…” Kei pulled me towards himself, so that my head was resting against his chest. He put an arm around me. “It’s okay. You’re safe now.” At first I was embarrassed, but I allowed myself to close my eyes. My stomach fluttered a little, but he felt so warm. So warm that I didn’t notice the way our surroundings were fading or how my crying gradually stopped.

“That was really scary,” I heard myself say. “…Thanks, Kei.”

“Now wake up,” he whispered.

“What?” When I opened my eyes, I was met by my pillow. My blankets were swirled in a mess around me. Disoriented, I turned over and caught a glimpse of the digital numbers on my alarm clock.
I gasped. “Shoot! I’m going to be late for school again!”
zombie toma

Dream Eater - Ch. 2 - "Heffalumps and Woozles"

Title: Dream Eater
Chapter: 2/? "Heffalumps and Woozles"
Rating: G
Notes: Pixels. Like, when you have a picture that's too tiny, and you zoom in on it too much, then the picture gets blurry and fuzzy around the edges? That's what I mean when I say pixels. Each little block of color in a picture. :D
Looking back at this, it doesn't quite match the chapters I'm writing now... But because I'm lazy and I liked how this turned out, I'll leave it for now. It's all just a dream, isn't it?
Oh, and I spaced it differently this time so it's easier to read!
Chapter 1: http://themikachu.livejournal.com/10968.html

“Evan! …EVAN!” I called out as I made my way to the corner of the hallway. My voice echoed off the dull-colored lockers around me, but still Evan didn’t look up from the book he was absorbed in. It was quiet as usual. We always met for lunch here, the quietest floor with the least traffic and a nice view of the courtyard below. The courtyard was filled with people since it was nearly the end of lunch.

“Evan, you’re never going to believe this!” I said, finally reaching him. There was a long pause.

“Waaaait,” he said calmly. “Lemme finish this page…”

I let out a sigh and sat down next to him, placing my dirty backpack against the wall. “C’mon! This is important!”

“Mmhmm..,” he answered. “You finally aced one of your calculus tests?”

“I-…what?! No! What’re you talking about?” I asked. “…Ugh, whatever. Listen, have you ever had dreams with really strange people in them and you’re, like, falling out of the sky?” Evan nodded silently. I looked at him with disbelief. “EVAN! Are you even listening to me?!” I snatched the book out of his hands and glared at him. He looked at me with wide eyes; I couldn’t tell if it were from fear or shock. Either way, it wasn’t important.

“Ah… No. No, I’ve never had a dream like that,” he said, his full attention finally on me. “What’s gotten you so worked up, anyway? You’re not usually like this…”

My eyes narrowed. “Have you ever seen a guy around school with brown hair and a blonde highlight over his eye?”

Evan looked around thoughtfully. Slowly, he nodded.

“REALLY?!” I shrieked, my voice again echoing down the hallway. “Last night I had thi-“

“Actually,” he said, cutting me off. “I’ve never seen anybody like that, now that I think of it. …Sorry.” He looked at me apologetically.

“…Well… Last night I dreamt-” Suddenly the bell rang and the hallway started flooding with people. “Oh, forget it,” I said, raising my voice so Evan could hear me. He shrugged, grabbed his book, and we went our separate ways.


For the next few nights, all I had were nightmares. At least, they’re all I could remember. Me being chased by creepy elephants. Me being slashed at with tiger claws. My brain being sucked out by leeches. I would wake up in cold sweat and my heart would be pounding through my chest. I didn’t dream of free falling, or of meeting strange mysterious boys. In fact, I hadn’t been seeing the boy I met in my dream anywhere at school. I was starting to question my sanity.

“You okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Or five,” Evan said, greeting me at the end of our hallway.

“Haven’t been getting good sleep…” I mumbled, rubbing my swollen eyes.

“Oh… I guess you do look tired and not… huh…” he trailed off in his own thoughts. “Studying all-nighters?”

I looked at him. “…No… I’ve been having nightmares. Every single night.”

“About what?” he asked, curious.

“Elephants,” I said flatly, then realized how stupid it sounded out loud. I heard Evan stifle a chuckle, and then pause.

“Me too…” he said without looking up. I stared at him.

“B-but dreams though,” he said noticing my expression. “Nice dreams… Tea parties with elephants in top hats and funky-colored snails giving me candy.” He laughed. I laughed too, picturing how silly Evan would look surrounded by rainbows and cartoonish animals at an Alice in Wonderland tea party setting.

“Yeah, maybe elephants are no big deal.” I started cracking up again.


That night I didn’t have any nightmares. But they definitely weren’t happy tea party dreams either. I was searching. Searching for… someone. I could hear them whispering behind me, but when I’d turn around there would be nobody there. It was dark, but I would catch glimpses of a person because they glowed softly like a candle in a dimly lit room. When I’d chase after them, they too would disappear. This continued for awhile, frustrating me. Instead of endlessly searching, I somehow found the will to stop and shout out.

“HEY!” The softly glowing figure I had been following stopped. I ran over to them, but as I touched their shoulder to turn them around, they exploded into pixels. Before I could react, suddenly it was as if my surroundings were melting into pixels, too. Through the holes that formed, bright light shone though. I covered my face with my arms, bracing myself for the brightness I expected to come.

“Look at me,” a voice said. I felt a light touch on my arm. I slowly peeked out from my shelter, and was met by a shadow surrounded in white. ‘No… no, not a shadow... A boy! Augh! Why did I always mix the two up?!’ As his face came into focus I recognized him.

“Mystery Boy!” I blurted out. I quickly covered my mouth, embarrassed. ‘I can’t believe I just said that out loud!’ Suddenly a small, blue pixel whooshed behind him. I gasped, remembering what had happened in my last dream with Mystery Boy. I felt my heart begin to accelerate as my eyes followed each pixel that passed us. “No! No, not this again!” I muttered, genuinely afraid this time. ‘It’s too much, it’s too much! I can’t take it!’

“Please don’t be afraid,” Mystery Boy said, cutting off my thoughts. He gently grabbed my face, so that I was forced to look at him. My hyperventilating slowed as I was mesmerized by his different colored eyes. When I was aware of myself again, I looked around, surprised to find us standing among a puff of clouds over looking a beautiful, deep blue ocean.

“Whoaaa…” I couldn’t believe my eyes. ‘How could those menacing flying pixels have turned into such a wonderful thing?’ I turned to Mystery Boy to ask him why, but he was oddly staring at something behind me. Curious, I began to turn my head.

“It’s about time you left,” he said seriously, holding on to my shoulder to prevent me from turning around.

“Wha-? …Wait!” I shouted as my vision began to blur white around the edges. “Wait, please! I… Who are you? Why are you… here? Why are WE HERE?” I had so many questions running through my mind.

He looked at me and said “…I can’t tell you.” The look on this face was almost… apologetic?

The white blur was quickly growing, and I was in a panic. “Please! At least tell me your name!”

His face had become a shadow but finally, “…Kei,” escaped from his lips.

With that, the white consumed me.
zombie toma

Dream Eater - Ch. 1 - "How Many Pixels in a Double Rainbow?"

Title: Dream Eater
Chapter: 1/? "How Many Pixels in a Double Rainbow?"
Rating: G
Notes: I thought I'd distract you guys with some writing before I got back to Japan Trip entries... This is the first chapter I wrote of my Dream Eater series for Writers' Club. It's unbeta'd, full of crack and the main character doesn't even have a name... Well, I do hope you'll enjoy it anyway. Excuse the Double Rainbow references. I obviously didn't have proper inspiration at the time of writing this...
I'll be posting the next chapter soon. It's much better, I promise! ^^;;


It was dark. I opened my eyes only to find it even darker. Darker than the darkest shade of black I could imagine. I shut my eyes again, feeling somehow safer. ‘Where am I?’ I thought, the words hollowly echoing in my head. Suddenly I was falling, like the ground beneath me had opened up and dropped me below. I didn’t scream or flail; I was unusually calm, and it perplexed me. I fell and fell into nothingness, until it didn’t even feel like I was falling anymore. I slowly opened my eyes and was surprised to find it blindingly white. The sudden change of light left my head spinning. I squinted my eyes to ease the burning. As my eyes adjusted, I noticed a long gray shadow floating above me. No, not a shadow… it was… a boy? He was staring directly at me, and was no more than two feet above me. The boy looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t place him. His expression was unreadable, but his eyes seemed to pierce through my own. I blinked a few times in confusion, furrowed my eyebrows, and opened my mouth to speak. As I was about to ask who he was, he grabbed my wrist and shot off.

It was as if we were flying. I couldn’t feel gravity, and I couldn’t see how fast we were moving due to our pure white surroundings. The only reason I knew we were moving fast was the silent wind that blew past us, ruffling our clothes and hair. I brushed a tousled lock out of my face and looked at the mysterious boy dragging me along. His clothing was unusual. His black attire contrasted heavily against our white background. It consisted of a long jacket that blew in the wind, revealing a skin-tight, zippered shirt, and jet black skinny jeans decorated in a series of chains, cloth ribbons and buttons. But it wasn’t the unusualness of this clothing that struck me; it was the way his clothing blew in the wind. The tips of cloth from his jacket blurred at the edges in a peculiar way, disappearing into what looked like… pixels? “Hey!” I called. “Wh-! “Just then, a large block of ‘red…pixel?!’ passed by us. Faster and faster, more colors whirred past us. “Oh my God…” I trailed off as the spectrums filled my eyes. Just when I thought I wouldn’t be able to take the visual stimulation anymore, we stopped. The boy turned around, and I noticed the silver splash of hair hanging over his eye in contrast to the rest of his black attire, including his hair. He seemed calm, and I felt overwhelmed. I looked around at our new surroundings. Everything was just “So bright… so vivid…” I swear I could see the look of pure surprise on the mystery boy’s face, as everything faded to white.

“Ughh,” I groaned, turning over in my bed to hide from the bright light coming from the lamp above my head. Since I never woke up to my alarm, the only other way to wake me up was to blind we with light every morning. “Thanks, Ma.” I said groggily.

I went to school, and it was the same as it always ways. Same dumb couples making out in the halls. Same stupid teachers ranting about their personal lives. Same crowded hallways. Same mystery boy staring at me. ‘Wait, what?!’ I froze, staring back at him but… his hair was brown instead of black, now blonde in place of his silver streak. He held my gaze for another moment, then turned away and disappeared into the crowd. “Wait!” I called, moving to follow him. “You! Wait! I saw you! I saw you in my-“ I stopped myself. ‘I’d sound like I’m crazy! That might not even be the same guy!... Ugh! What does this mean?’
zombie toma

My search for Ningen Shikakku! Help?

I did end up going to JapanTown today. Apparently my brother wanted to each lunch there before he had to leave again. And I thought "Great! I can go look for the Toma version of Ningen Shikakku!"
So we ate lunch first. I had tempura, since that's what I always eat. My mom had okonomiyaki, since she saw Toma and Maki eating it in Hana Kimi (what a great reason, huh? xD)
At the bookstore, I purposely stayed away from the Japanese magazines. I know January issues are out, and I'd rather buy them with my friend so I don't feel so guilty. Ha.

I was able to find the English version of Ningen Shikakku, so I'm planning to ask for that for my birthday. (Which is February 1st. Coming up fast. O: )
I wandered off to the Japanese section, with no clue where I was going. All the signs were in Kanji, and I fail when it comes to Kanji. There were SO many shelves, and I was trying to match the author's name and the book title to the Kanji I had copied down from the internet.
My mom started to help, but she knows absolutely no Japanese. She kept pointing out the wrong books. And she kept talking REALLY loud. Way to tell the whole bookstore how crappy my Japanese is. I was so embarrassed. I'm sure we looked stupid wandering around the Japanese section. I sure felt stupid, anyway. My mom said I should go ask for help, so I did. I asked this man at the counter and he found the book REALLY FAST. It was about 2-3 shelves away from where my family and I had been searching. xD
So the guy points to the book, and I say "Okay, thanks," only to realize Toma's not on the cover! It must've been the original version. I didn't buy it. What would be the point? NO TOMA!

So. Anybody's who has ordered Toma versions of Osamu Dazai's books, can you give me links to where you bought them from? I REALLY want Ningen Shikakku. And I have a feeling the bookstore I went to won't have copies until closer to the movie release date or something.
zombie toma

The beginning of an addiction...

((Just a note before I start: I'm going to stop posting direct links to videos. You'll have to copy and paste the link yourselves. I just don't want these lovely videos to get deleted or anything. You guys know how YouTube's been lately...))

Since people asked about my Toma addiction, I thought I'd do an entry on it! Yhey! (This will probably be long...)

Maybe I should start from the very beginning...
I've always been a fan of manga.
I had gotten a subscription for Animerica magazine as a present. But I never actually received any of the issues because they stopped making 'em. I started to get Shojo Beat instead, and I instantly fell in love with it! Absolute Boyfriend was one of my favorites, since I was already a fan of Yuu Watase. That's one of the few mangas I've read that I enjoyed from start to finish.
Anyway. I had not yet been introduced to the world of JDramas yet. People had always been recommending to me, but I was so addicted to manga and anime that I didn't really pay attention to my friends. Actually. A friend of mine told me to look at the site Instantz.net since there was anime on there.

So according to my diary (Pfft, yeah, I had to look in that old thing) I noticed there were JDramas on Instantz. On July 15, 2008, I started watching Zettai Kareshi (Absolute Boyfriend). Of course I loved it, even though it was different from the manga. Soshi was my favorite character in the manga, and he also became my favorite in the drama. He was played by Mizushima Hiro. My first Japanese idol.
(I'd rather not go into too much detail, but Mizushima was the reason I started liking one of my ex-boyfriends. I thought this boy in my class looked like him: long hair, tall, skinny, and mysteriously hot. I went out with that guy for two weeks before he dumped me. It was then I decided it was safer to have crushes on Japanese actors. xD)

*skims through diary* Wow... Well... Apparently I didn't watch anything immediately after Zettai Kareshi. Or at least I didn't write about it.
So it wasn't until I guess April 4, 2009 that I started watching Hana Kimi. It was recommended to me, had high ratings on Mysoju, and Mizushima was in it! And yeah, I instantly fell in love with Toma. My diary has "ORE WA HOMO JANAI!!" written in big letters on this page. Haha. So by the end of the series, I thought Hana Kimi was the best thing ever. I started looking up videos on YouTube. Then I started specifically searching for Ikuta Toma (And yes, I looked up his REAL name early in the series, so he was already TOMA to me, not NAKATSU.)
This is the first video I found of him singing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J21wTwrDKVc
"WHAT?! TOMA SINGS?!" I'm sure we've all experienced this sometime in our Toma fangirl lives... And this is embarrassing to admit, but I thought he was YamaPi at first because of the dyed hair. xDDD
But of course I figured it out as I watched more and more videos. And then I discovered Johnny's Entertainment. (Yeah. I am no longer pure. xD Inside joke, I guess) It was then I started to wonder why Toma never debuted. But part of me is happy he didn't, because then he probably wouldn't have been in all the stageplays he's done. And he'd be too busy touring to shoot movies and dramas!
I became a TomaPi fan. And a 4TOPS/3TOPS fan. Probably from adorable videos of them from way back when... Like this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mCxtYaMMr_c&feature=related
Ah, this is also when I discovered Tomalicious. One of the best subbing sites ever! xD

I also met one of my now best friends at school through Jdrama talk. It gets boring complaining about Japanese teachers, so why not talk about Japanese things?! I eventually asked him what JDrama I should watch. And he told me Maou, since he knew I was a big Toma fan. He also said Ohno from Arashi was in it too. But at the time, I didn't really know Arashi. 

((Haha, my diary entry says "Oh no! It's Ohno! Maou is a pretty good so far. Suspense/mystery dramas aren't my favorite, so I probably don't like it as much as I should. Daddy just gave me french fries! LOL!")) xD And don't worry, the way the drama tied up on the last ep., of course it was pretty wicked. I told my brother to watch it, so hopefully I'll get to watch it again with him! Yhey!

After Maou, my friend told me to watch Hana Yori Dango, since it had MatsuJun from Arashi (This friend also got me addicted to Arashi). After Hana Yori Dango, OHHHH MY GAHHHH Arashi was the next best thing after Toma. But I won't get into that. If you were wondering, I actually liked MatsuJun first, but now Ohno's my favorite. Then Aiba. MatsuJun went to the bottom of the list because I don't like his nasally singing... Sorry, but I can't seem to figure out why everybody loves Nino either...)

Hm. So pretty much since then I've been spending entire days searching for Toma or Arashi videos. Each time I find a new video or show, my love just grows, if you know what I mean. Watching videos of Toma is one of the only things that keeps me going nowadays. School is very stressful for me, so whenever I get a free moment from working it's always nice to watch some Toma!

If I can remember more stuff about how I got addicted to Johnny's Crack (xD), I'll add it to another entry.
And if you read all of this, thanks. I also invite you to write about how you got hooked to Toma! (Or any other JE member)
zombie toma

Arashi for CHRISTMAS?!

Hey guyssssss.
My mom gave me ARASHI stuff for Christmas today! (I'm sure she would've given me Toma stuff, but there is like NOTHING on Ebay. And she wouldn't know where else to look.)

Aug 2000 Wink Up back-issue, 2010 desk calender, 2007 Final Summer Tour DVD

Here's the desk calender! I really want a full length calender of Arashi (Or even better: TOMA!) But I don't know where to get one for cheap...

Their most recent tour on DVD. Says my mom.

SQUEEEE!!!! Everybody is so adorable and dorky! xD
My mom told me she got me this issue, because this makes Arashi, and Toma, my age. C:

I'll take some pictures of the pages inside when I get a chance.
Toma looks SO ADORABLE!

Ah! And here's the Toma collage I promised. I could've done more on it, but I had to get it done before my party. xD
Pikachu on Toma's armpit? LOLWUT?

Also, I just watched the 'Making of' for Cat in the Red Boots (Since I hadn't found the time earlier this week to watch it)... It was just as enjoyable to watch as the entire stageplay! They even celebrated Toma's 22nd Birthday during one of their shows (poor Marika...) I can't believe Toma's 25 now. At least he's still really cute! :D
If you haven't watched Cat in the Red Boots, then you MUST! NOW!!! It's subbed by Baka no Sekai fansubs! :DDD
zombie toma

Time to make Toma friends!

At the moment: Obsessing over Toma... AGAIN

About to: Watch Toma's Yomino Kimyou na Monogatari

Today's thoughts: "LJ is such a great site to be on. I've met so many Toma fans already."
Because seriously, there are like NO Toma fans at school. There are just a lot of "Hey! That's the guy from Hana Kimi. What's his name? Na...Nakatsu?" And I just say "HIS NAME IS TOMA だよ!!"

"I got my Toma collage up"
It looks great. I'll take pictures of it soon and post it up.

"I finished Cat in the Red Boots last night!"
Toma was God-like. I can't get enough of him. His character was perfect for him, or at least he was an amazing actor. I could watch him swordfight allll night looong! すばらしかった、斗真くん!

”Just be glad I'm not one of those "OMG I'M GONNA MARRY TOMA AND BEAR HIS CHILDREN" types."
Seriously. I can't stand those people. I'm not interested in marrying any celebs. I don't even day-dream about that. It kinda freaks me out. Toma is my idol, not my fantasy.

Video of the day: www.youtube.com/watch
Just in time for Christmas. I guess. I'm busy with parties the next few days, so I'm giving this to you guys early. メりクリスマス!

I realized in the video I posted the other day (3TOPS doing the children's medley) Toma doesn't actually disappear after he gets on the tricycle. He goes into the stands behind the stage and sings among all the fans there. And THAT is why there is screaming. :D

Picture of the day:
zombie toma

Historical fiction short story- "Kieryn"

            Click. Kieryn locked the rotting door of her tattered house, and slipped her skeleton key into one of her many pockets of her uniform. As if bounty hunting, cave exploration, or pest extermination really needed a uniform. She stepped out into the road, which was lined with beggars and barefooted children in ragged clothing. No one paid any attention to Kieryn as she walked down the dirt path, rocks crunching beneath her boots.

            As Kieryn traveled closer to the Marketplace, the chaotic, and near deafening sounds, of the hustle-and-bustle of the town filled her ears. She slipped her hood over her head to avoid any attention. It was almost a struggle to get through the crowds, but Kieryn reached her destination: the Tavern. It was much quieter inside.


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